A Return to Joy and Pleasure

As many people would know from my previous posts, I've been a bit down as of late due to the fact that I haven't had any opportunities to play. When you're a submissive with a lot of energy and no dominant to play with, it can be an exercise in frustration and even anger. Well, I can safely say that my little dry spell has finally been broken. And, with a little luck, things will stay that way for some time to come.

Recently, I attented a play party that was a sort of follow up to a local munch. I didn't really have very high expectations for either event since trying to get like-minded kinky people to come together in one place is very difficult in a community of my size. The potential for being "outed" and thusly having your life made a living hell is quite high and many people, understandably, don't want to take that risk. So, the munch went fine. There were a very nice several rounds of pool, a few drinks, and some pizza with a small group of kinky folks. There was conversation, some laughter, and new friends were made. Honestly, that was as far as I thought the weekend would go, and I was actually okay with it. When it comes to kink, things can take time and confidences need to be built up, so if I could make the acquaintance with some new kinky people and maybe given them a bit of my limited knowledge about kinky life, I was happy.

The potential play party that was to happen the following evening was a different story. Honestly, I didn't hold out too much hope for it. Out of all of the play parties I've been to thus far, I've only been able to play once and that was it. To be honest, I was getting more than a little tired of the teasing. By that I don't mean any one person or even a group of people tormenting me that they could play and that I couldn't. It was more of a self-inflicted mental tease and torment that would come about when I would see other individuals or couples enjoying themselves and each other by playing. I've never faulted any of these people, in fact, I consider them lucky that they have people that they can play with. However, it didn't stop me from feeling a constant build of energy that had absolutely no where to go. A friend of mine used the expression "sub-frenzy", which I think is actually rather appropriate for the emotions I was experiencing. So, with all of this pent up energy and desire coupled with disappointment, I think it was perfectly reasonable to either expect no one to show to the party or even decline going simply because I didn't want to be put into that position of having to watch everyone else enjoy themselves.

In the end, however, when I learned that this new couple that I'd met the night prior were deffinately attending the party, even though they would be the only ones, I decided what the hell and went. I got myself all prettied up and went to the party. Bear in mind, I was not expecting to play that night. I simply looked at this as an opportunity to get dressed up and be around like-minded people and perhaps engage in interesting conversations that could potentially lead to either assisting them in discovering what they were looking for or discovering for myself what they already knew they wanted.

Well, imagine my surprise and delight when, not long after arriving at the party, I found myself on my knees at the feet of a strong but gentle woman. It really came out of no where, but I'm oh so glad it did. Remember, I didn't go to this party with any expectations of playing. I didn't even know if these new people would take on the role of dominant or submissive or both. What followed for the rest of an all too brief but wonderful night was a lovely experience of gentle dominance and submission. Since my particular vein in this lifestyle is exactly that, I don't do well with pain since it puts me into a very different mindset, this couldn't have worked out more perfectly. The only bad part was the night coming to an end and leave me wanting more. But, I suppose that's a good way to conclude an evening of play so I'll be anticipating that next scene so much more.

It's nice to know that after so much time having been spent spinning within my own mind that there was finally a positive release along with the excellent potential for more enjoyment in the near future. In the end, that's all a submissive really wants.